No honest and decent person wants to go through a long, messy break-up. In an ideal world, every divorce would end swiftly, with both sides happy with the eventual outcome. Unfortunately, this isn’t always the way it works. There are things you can do to make sure your divorce goes as smoothly as possible though. This guide should help you with that.
Compromise is an unavoidable fact of divorce, so don’t fight it. The only way to reach a fair conclusion is for both parties to meet in the middle and then part on the best terms possible. Don’t spend your time worrying about which side is winning or losing.
If you both approach the divorce sensibly, there’s no reason you can’t both come out of it as winners. As long as both parties feel like they’re able to move on comfortably by the end of proceedings, it’s a positive divorce. Remember that!
Stay on Speaking Terms
It’s best to maintain some sort of relationship leading up to the divorce because you’re going to need to be on good terms if you want things to go smoothly. It’s not always possible to stay friends, but try to keep in contact and remain pleasant.
Usually, when you’re going through a divorce, people are giving you advice and telling you want to do from all angles. Try to avoid all this though. You should keep the proceedings between you and your partner.
Get a Good, Clean Lawyer
You may think that the best way to have a quick, easy divorce is to go through the process without a lawyer, but I’d have to disagree. A good lawyer can take some of the inevitable stress off your shoulders and make sure all the small details are in order.
If your partner is refusing to compromise or is not accepting what you think is a fair deal, you will definitely need a lawyer. It becomes much easier to negotiate if you have a legal professional on your side.
Stay Calm and Communicate
Communication is the key to a smooth divorce. Ideally, you shouldn’t just communicate via lawyers. It’s best to sit down before the divorce proceedings begin and talk things through to make sure you are on the same page.
This kind of communication will be rendered impossible unless you keep calm though. Going into the divorce like a bull in a china shop will not help anyone. Act like an adult and keep your cool, no matter how frustrating things get.
Take the Children into Consideration
Divorce can be really hard on the kids involved, so try to do what you feel is best for them. Your feelings and preferences should go out the window if your divorce is affecting the children. This should be the single biggest motivation for both parties to make the divorce as swift and as pleasant as it possibly can be.
Hide any resentment and anger that you may feel from the children. Make it clear to them that you’ll both still be parents and that you don’t hate each other. Even if you aren’t united on any other subject, you should be on this one.